Last week, with the new-felt freedom of summer, I think I might have taken it a little far... Amirah and I packed so much into four days our heads were spinning. We had several playdates, ran errands, took a stollercising class, played outside under the oak tree, and in the midst of all that took a few naps.
This week I am trying to give her more of a schedule. So far today we've only been out for stollercising and we are spending the rest of the day relaxing around the house. She is sleeping now and I really want to nap (despite the fact I've already taken one nap today). Summer just fills my soul!
I am also trying my hand at making homemade yogurt again. Tomorrow I want to make Sabrina's garbanzo bean cake. It sounds so interesting I can't help but try it.
On Thursday we leave for Florida to spend several days with the Burch's (Ysmaille's American parents). We are looking forward to having Amirah meet the other side of her family. Already I'm overwhelmed with what travelling with a baby means. How many diapers should I bring? Should I bring toys for the airplane ride? Do I bring my breast pump or not? No more just picking up and leaving. Each trip (even a trip to the grocery store) becomes more calculated.
I think I've made up my mind about that nap. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....
Monday, June 21, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
A Matter of Perspective
Life is mostly about your perspective.
When Ysmaille and I argue about something and I feel so angry and hurt inside, at the same time I am so grateful that I have a husband and I know in the secret places of my heart that this too shall pass and we'll have forgotten all about it by tomorrow.
When I've had a difficult day at work and it's so hard to feel like I am really making a difference. When I feel like I've blown it because I've yelled or been impatient, at the same time I remember the note that I got that morning that said, "Mrs. Eliacin, your the best teacher ever!" and I know that I AM making a difference.
When Amirah is crying for no apparant reason. When she has been fed, and cleaned, and kissed, and cuddled, and still insists on crying and I feel like crying too because I just don't know what to do, at the same time I am so thankful for her and know that nothing is more fulfilling than knowing that I am her mom and she is perfect!
When I feel overwhelmed by all that has to get done in a day-- report cards, laundry, making dinner, teacher conferences, grocery shopping, cleaning... At the same time I am grateful for my health that allows me to get so much done in a day.
Life is a matter of perspective.
When Ysmaille and I argue about something and I feel so angry and hurt inside, at the same time I am so grateful that I have a husband and I know in the secret places of my heart that this too shall pass and we'll have forgotten all about it by tomorrow.
When I've had a difficult day at work and it's so hard to feel like I am really making a difference. When I feel like I've blown it because I've yelled or been impatient, at the same time I remember the note that I got that morning that said, "Mrs. Eliacin, your the best teacher ever!" and I know that I AM making a difference.
When Amirah is crying for no apparant reason. When she has been fed, and cleaned, and kissed, and cuddled, and still insists on crying and I feel like crying too because I just don't know what to do, at the same time I am so thankful for her and know that nothing is more fulfilling than knowing that I am her mom and she is perfect!
When I feel overwhelmed by all that has to get done in a day-- report cards, laundry, making dinner, teacher conferences, grocery shopping, cleaning... At the same time I am grateful for my health that allows me to get so much done in a day.
Life is a matter of perspective.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Two and a half months to a better me...
Ever feel like you just aren't living up to your potential? I'm there right now. Being a full-time teacher and a new mom has been both delightful and challenging at the same time and I know that I have let parts of me fade away. This summer I am going to find those pieces of me that have been lurking in the shadows of my busy life.
I have come to terms with the fact that I can't do it all. And I'm okay with that. But with summer coming I know I can do more because I don't have the stress of working. I am already so excited to report that I have achieved one of the items on my "bucket list". I have a pumpkin, a tomato, a pepper, oregeno, basil, and mint thriving in my back yard. It's a small start, but I feel so domestic. On my list of domestic hopefuls is making homemade yogurt again, trying my hand once more at making laundry detergent, finding even more coupon bargains, and baking at least one loaf of bread.
I am also really excited to rekindle my times with God. I am sad to say that I have often let my head hit the pillow without really setting time aside for my Creator-- the lover of my soul. I have felt Him by my side as I tackle what it means to be a mom, a teacher, a wife, a friend, a daughter... I want this summer to cement the things I've already learned about who He is and how He operates.
The goal that will be hardest for me to achieve is getting back in shape. Right before I became pregnant I was beginning to jog-- only short distances at a time-- but jogging none-the-less. I really want to start lifting weights and jogging. I am starting tonight. Ysmaille is waiting in the basement for me to start my first night of training. Here I go. Wish me luck.
Here's to my potential and the new and improved Melanie!
I have come to terms with the fact that I can't do it all. And I'm okay with that. But with summer coming I know I can do more because I don't have the stress of working. I am already so excited to report that I have achieved one of the items on my "bucket list". I have a pumpkin, a tomato, a pepper, oregeno, basil, and mint thriving in my back yard. It's a small start, but I feel so domestic. On my list of domestic hopefuls is making homemade yogurt again, trying my hand once more at making laundry detergent, finding even more coupon bargains, and baking at least one loaf of bread.
I am also really excited to rekindle my times with God. I am sad to say that I have often let my head hit the pillow without really setting time aside for my Creator-- the lover of my soul. I have felt Him by my side as I tackle what it means to be a mom, a teacher, a wife, a friend, a daughter... I want this summer to cement the things I've already learned about who He is and how He operates.
The goal that will be hardest for me to achieve is getting back in shape. Right before I became pregnant I was beginning to jog-- only short distances at a time-- but jogging none-the-less. I really want to start lifting weights and jogging. I am starting tonight. Ysmaille is waiting in the basement for me to start my first night of training. Here I go. Wish me luck.
Here's to my potential and the new and improved Melanie!
Friday, May 28, 2010
Summer Dreamin'
I am really trying hard to relish each day, but I have to admit I can hardly wait until school is out and I can revel in the freedom that is summer. Despite the stress of this particular job I don't know of any other job where you can work 9.5 months of the year and get paid for 12. (Although anyone who is a teacher or is married to one knows that we spend hours in our classrooms even during the summer months). I am more thankful than ever for summer vacation.
I can't wait to really get to know my baby girl. I know a lot already: she hates tummy time, although she is now able to lift her head 90 degrees; she loves to chew on everything (her fingers, my hair, car seat straps...); she knows when she is hungry and lets everyone around her know it as well. I have some burning questions of my own though: How long will she sleep in if I don't wake her up at 7:00? If I am home all day will she take a morning, afternoon, and evening nap? Will she be okay eating every four hours instead of three? She is surrounded by people who love her all day long-- Aunt Angela and Natalie, Grammy and Monica, Mommy, and Daddy, but she doesn't have a ton of consistency. I'm so anxious to give her that.
Here are our summer plans:
- Go to school once a week to work in Mommy's classroom.
- Go to the pool
- Play with Natalie and Aunt Angela
- Visit Pappy and Nana Burch in Florida
- Lots of kissing and cuddling
- Strollercising so Mommy can get back in shape
I can't wait to really get to know my baby girl. I know a lot already: she hates tummy time, although she is now able to lift her head 90 degrees; she loves to chew on everything (her fingers, my hair, car seat straps...); she knows when she is hungry and lets everyone around her know it as well. I have some burning questions of my own though: How long will she sleep in if I don't wake her up at 7:00? If I am home all day will she take a morning, afternoon, and evening nap? Will she be okay eating every four hours instead of three? She is surrounded by people who love her all day long-- Aunt Angela and Natalie, Grammy and Monica, Mommy, and Daddy, but she doesn't have a ton of consistency. I'm so anxious to give her that.
Here are our summer plans:
- Go to school once a week to work in Mommy's classroom.
- Go to the pool
- Play with Natalie and Aunt Angela
- Visit Pappy and Nana Burch in Florida
- Lots of kissing and cuddling
- Strollercising so Mommy can get back in shape
Amirah eating rice cereal for the first time. Another thing we'll need to work on this summer!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
My "Bucket List"
After being inspired by my good friend, Erin I have decided to create my own "bucket list."
Here it goes (in no apparent order)...
1. Grow my own vegetables and freeze/can them. My plan is to grow tomotoes and peppers this summer. I am also hoping to freeze corn, strawberry jelly, and applesauce.
2. Travel to South America.
3. I have always wanted to bungee jump before I turned 30, but that is only a month away and seeing as I have a 2 month old at home it doesn't seem like the wisest idea, so I am now chaning that dream to riding in a hot air balloon.
4. Make an office in a closet. They show these all the time in decorating and organizing magazines and I really want to try it.
5. Make a canopy for my bed. Before I do this I want to buy a new bed, as we are sleeping on the same mattress I've had since middle school.
6. Weigh 130 lbs. Right now this seems harder than all the above put together.
7. Finish the book I started this winter. I know this sounds like an easy accomplishment, but it seems that when I have any down time I just want to read magazines because it's less of a committment.
8. Go to Paris. I know it's overrated, but I want to see it for myself. Plus, having a husband that speaks French makes it seem a little more doable.
9. Sleep through the night.
10. Buy $100 worth of groceries for $25 or less.
That sums it up. Some are more attainable than others. I'll let you know how it goes...
Here it goes (in no apparent order)...
1. Grow my own vegetables and freeze/can them. My plan is to grow tomotoes and peppers this summer. I am also hoping to freeze corn, strawberry jelly, and applesauce.
2. Travel to South America.
3. I have always wanted to bungee jump before I turned 30, but that is only a month away and seeing as I have a 2 month old at home it doesn't seem like the wisest idea, so I am now chaning that dream to riding in a hot air balloon.
4. Make an office in a closet. They show these all the time in decorating and organizing magazines and I really want to try it.
5. Make a canopy for my bed. Before I do this I want to buy a new bed, as we are sleeping on the same mattress I've had since middle school.
6. Weigh 130 lbs. Right now this seems harder than all the above put together.
7. Finish the book I started this winter. I know this sounds like an easy accomplishment, but it seems that when I have any down time I just want to read magazines because it's less of a committment.
8. Go to Paris. I know it's overrated, but I want to see it for myself. Plus, having a husband that speaks French makes it seem a little more doable.
9. Sleep through the night.
10. Buy $100 worth of groceries for $25 or less.
That sums it up. Some are more attainable than others. I'll let you know how it goes...
Monday, March 15, 2010
My "Relaxing" Massage...
For my graduation present Mom and Dad gave me a gift certificate to Warm Springs Day Spa. That was all the way back in May and I just never got around to using it. It was one of things where you know if you use it you won't have that luxury again for awhile so you just want to save it. Last week I made an appointment for Saturday. I thought I could use a little pampering before returning to school.
At 2:47 my massage began and it was glorious! About 10 minutes into I suddently thought, "Oh no! I have no idea when I last shaved." With having a newborn at home, shaving somehow didn't make it the top of my to-do list. I figured it probably hadn't been more than 2 or 3 days, and that probably wasn't the worst they've seen.
I was able to relax until I thought, "Oh no! I am going to have to turn over and she is going to see that I buy my underwear in packs of five at Target." How embarassing.
As I turned face down and put my head in the hole I willed myself not to drool. For some reason I've been a drooling machine lately. In fact, the other day I took a nap with my adorable baby girl and she woke up with drool on her face. Not hers. Mine! What kind of a mother am I?
I was able to control my drooling, but then another terrible thought crossed my mind... What happens if my breasts start to leak? After all I haven't laid on my stomache in almost a year. First because I was pregnant, and now because breastfeeding has taken over my life.
The next thing you know the massage therapist said, "Okay, Melanie. Thank you. Take your time getting dressed and I'll meet you in the hall." Wait! It's over already? I looked at the clock and sure enough... it was 3:37. Fifty minutes had passed. I think next time I'll use my certificate to get a pedicure. So much less to worry about.
At 2:47 my massage began and it was glorious! About 10 minutes into I suddently thought, "Oh no! I have no idea when I last shaved." With having a newborn at home, shaving somehow didn't make it the top of my to-do list. I figured it probably hadn't been more than 2 or 3 days, and that probably wasn't the worst they've seen.
I was able to relax until I thought, "Oh no! I am going to have to turn over and she is going to see that I buy my underwear in packs of five at Target." How embarassing.
As I turned face down and put my head in the hole I willed myself not to drool. For some reason I've been a drooling machine lately. In fact, the other day I took a nap with my adorable baby girl and she woke up with drool on her face. Not hers. Mine! What kind of a mother am I?
I was able to control my drooling, but then another terrible thought crossed my mind... What happens if my breasts start to leak? After all I haven't laid on my stomache in almost a year. First because I was pregnant, and now because breastfeeding has taken over my life.
The next thing you know the massage therapist said, "Okay, Melanie. Thank you. Take your time getting dressed and I'll meet you in the hall." Wait! It's over already? I looked at the clock and sure enough... it was 3:37. Fifty minutes had passed. I think next time I'll use my certificate to get a pedicure. So much less to worry about.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Our Sweet Baby Girl
Nothing could have prepared me for this love I have for Amirah. I love her with a fierce love-- a love different from how I love Ysmaille. I know it is my job to protect her, to intercede for her, to love her unconditionally. Each morning when I pick her up out of her crib my heart melts like I am seeing her for the first time. When she stretches and makes her screeching noise I have to stop what I'm doing just to pick her up and snuggle. It's an impulse I am unable to control. At least once a day I look at Ysmaille and marvel to him about absolutely perfect our little girl is.
When I think about going back to work I am so conflicted. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I can still be a great mom and work full-time, but it is hard to think of someone else seeing her firsts-- first giggle, first roll-over, first steps. I keep thinking that God knows how important that is to me and maybe he'll reserve those moments for a time when I am with her. Whether to stay at home or not is a choice that every mom must make. This was the choice I made and it is the right one for our family. One thing for sure, I will treasure every moment I have with my little princess.
My greatest prayer for her life is that she knows who she is at a young age. Although I want her to be proud of her earthly heritage-- part American, part Haitian, it is even more important to me that she know her place in the Kingdom. I pray daily that she won't have to go through the same struggles as Ysmaille and I did. I want her to be confident in who she is as a child of the Most High. One of the reasons we chose the name Amirah is because it means princess, for she is truly a child of the King!
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